Conflict Resolution

I am not any conflicts and have not had any in recent times that may be relevant to this discussion. I will, therefore, share one that I have witnessed between two of my colleagues. I have seen them give each other the ‘silent treatment’ for five days because of a disagreement over the balancing of their workloads. One strategy that could have helped to resolve the conflict more productively would have been honest communication. As they confided in me separately I realized that they were not aware of some things that were being experienced and felt among them. I could see that one individual was using the “Escapist strategy” and was simply avoiding the issue. This may help to resolve the conflict eventually as time passes and they go about their activities the workloads may be forgotten. This may not be long lasting, however, as when they have to work together again this same old may again be an issue.

One conflict resolution strategy that I feel could be effective in this situation would be for them to consider the importance of the outcome (O’Hair & Weimann, 2015). They could look at the long-range goal of getting the job done, and divide the workload fairly between the two individuals confirming that everyone is aware of their responsibilities. With this agreement, everyone would know what is expected of them.  A second strategy could be to debate and argue (O’Hair & Weimann, 2015). In the situation, neither of the two parties knew how the other was feeling. If they had argued openly about it hurt feelings would have been aired. As questions were asked they would have to be answered and again information would be passed on so both persons would know how much the other had to do and the scale could be balanced.

Reference

O'Hair, D., Wiemann, M., Mullin, D. I., & Teven, J.  (2015). Real communication (3rd. ed). New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.

Who Am I as a Communicator

I have always excelled at public communication so it was no surprise when the communication anxiety inventory showed a low score. This score stayed in the same range with everyone that I surveyed. I chose to survey my husband who I felt knew me very well, and a close colleague from work. I was surprised, however, to see the differences in the scores for the verbal aggressiveness scale.

When I took the verbal aggressiveness inventory, I achieved a low score. This indicated according to the results that I am “respectful of the viewpoints and intelligence of others” (Rubin, Palmgreen, & Sypher, 2009). Both of the other surveys indicated that my level of aggressiveness was moderate rather than low. This indicated that I maintain a balance between respect for others and arguing fairly with them. I was also surprised to realize how I am perceived by others and my lack of patience that is evident by the way I react to other adults that I may not agree with.

Taking this inventory as convinced me that I need to be more respectful of the viewpoints of others. I also need to be able to appreciate that just as people are all uniquely different, our communication styles will also be different. It was encouraging to note that even though you may disagree with an individual’s position on an issue, you may attack the position that they hold, while still being respectful and cordial to the individual who is holding that position. This knowledge will be a critical factor as I seek to develop positive relations not only with my parents in the early childhood field but also with the persons that I will work with.

Reference

Rubin, R. B., Palmgreen, P., & Sypher, H. E. (Eds.) (2009). Communication research measures: A sourcebook. New York: Routledge.

Communication

I have never given it any thought before, but I realize that I communicate differently with people from different groups and cultures. As I seek to be understood I utilize different methods of communication based on the group that I am speaking with. People from different cultures view the world differently. This can result in conflicts and misunderstandings as they interact across cultures (O’Hair & Weimann, 2015).

As an educator in the classroom, I am careful to speak correctly as I model proper grammar for my children. I also choose my words carefully, giving definitions and examples of usage when I think it may be necessary. When I speak to the parents of my students, I am careful to be positive and optimistic. Again, I make sure to speak properly as a professional. I recently attended a convention for teachers of mathematics. As I interacted with other professionals at the convention I was unsure about their varied cultures. As a result, I asked and answered questions but kept other unnecessary conversation to a minimum.  When I am at home, I feel free to speak the colloquial jargon of my country with no effort to correct my grammar. I know I will be accepted regardless at home so I basically let my hair down.

One strategy that is used for communication between diverse cultures is the use of uncertainty avoidance which involves adjusting your behavior to avoid or reduce conflict and risk (O’Hair & Weimann, 2015). Another overlooked strategy is listening.  Finally, behavioral flexibility, which describes the willingness to use different forms of communication in different situations is a strategy that the successful communicator will be sure to employ (O’Hair & Weimann, 2015). As the setting or participants change, then the type of communication will also change.  

Reference

O'Hair, D., Wiemann, M., Mullin, D. I., & Teven, J.  (2015). Real communication (3rd. ed). New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.

VERBAL VS NON-VERBAL COMMUNICATION

To compare verbal versus non-verbal communication I watched an episode of the Good Times comedy show. I first watched the episode on mute and noted what I believed was happening based on the non-verbal communication between the characters. The episode began with one character, a young woman who is cooking and reading a magazine at the same time. She is more absorbed in the magazine than the cooking. She is distracted by something and looks to her left with a concerned look on her face. At this moment a young boy around 8 to 10 years old walks into the apartment, shouts some seemingly angry words out the door, then proceeds to slam it shut. He then marches over to the woman and begins talking animatedly to her. They talk back and forth and she walks away from the stove and puts the magazine down on the counter behind her.

The boy begins to stir the pot, lifting up the spoon with an expression on his face that shows disgust for what is in the pot. He says something to the woman who takes the spoon from him. She goes over to the table and she begins setting it with a few bowls. As she sets the table she is speaking angrily to the boy. At this time a young man enters the apartment and addresses the woman. He begins to sniff around with a confused look on his face. He heads over to the stove and point to the pot that is still cooking, picks it up and says something about the pot to the woman. She stamps away from him, says what seem to be angry words, from her body language, and goes over to the refrigerator.

The young man calls the little boy over and gives him some mail reading them out one at a time. He takes another envelope and reads what is on it. The young woman rushes over and tries to get the envelope which he holds up high. They argue back and forth and the little boy runs over in the middle of them. The argument seems to turn to the little boy who spins left to right from one character to another.

At this time an older woman enters into the living area of the apartment from one of the other rooms. She says something to the three young people which they all ignore. She then shouts something out loud at them and they all stop what they were doing and spins around to face her.

As I watched the episode the second time with the volume one I realized in some instances the facial expressions and body language of the characters helped me to realize just what was happening. At other times I was totally off the mark. The little boy entered the apartment and was arguing with a friend with whom he was angry. This was clear from his actions. As the food in the pot is discussed, it is obvious that the young woman does not know how to cook, and so the smell of the food which begins to burn is not inviting.

I thought the two young adults were arguing with the little boy as he spun from one of them toward the other. As I listen, I realize that he was actually defending each of them from the other and they were really arguing with each other. It was obvious with both viewing, that the older woman was in charge and that the young people all respected her. 

Competent Communication

Competent Communication  

            I have a co-worker, Mrs. Nadia Rodriquez, who I think consistently demonstrates competent communication.  Mrs. Rodriquez is able to convert her thoughts into words in a very clear and concise manner. She is known to use everyday applications that clearly outline her ideas to her audience with clarity so even young persons are able to understand, while at the same time not seeming too childish for adults present. She is a very animated speaker, who understands the importance of the use of volume and tempo to keep her listeners hanging on to her words. She also uses her hands as she speaks, but not too much to distract her listening audience.

            While speaking to her students, I have seen her engaging them in the conversation, and actively listen to them when they are speaking. When giving presentations to her co-worker, she demonstrates good eye contact with the audience and involves them as well to keep their interest. She is a keen listener, who responds to questions respectfully without putting others down. Mrs. Rodriquez demonstrates an excellent command of the ‘Queen’s English’ the official tongue of The Commonwealth of The Bahamas, while also be quite capable of the local dialect when interacting informally with friends.

            I would gladly model some of my own communication behaviors after Mrs. Rodriquez’s. When she speaks, she is able to command the attention of her listeners. She has the ability to put her words together in a manner to make her point in a way that is witty and interesting. As I seek to advocate for my children and their families, there will be times when I will have to speak concerning issues to a group of persons. At these times I would want to be able to grab my audience’s attention, and to keep them focused on the issues at hand, and to influence them to make specific changes. This is one example where competent communication is vital.